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Writer's pictureShary Gentry

There Is Always Someone Who Knows More

Updated: May 20


While I've never been clever or disciplined enough to complete large jigsaw puzzles, I have come to enjoy the art and science of solving large family mysteries and even small ones that others might find tedious or trivial. 


I worked diligently to figure out the identity of a DNA match. This was not a delicate situation, such as discovering a long-lost sibling or an unexpected father, but about finding a distant cousin with a common name. A social media enthusiast, I sent direct messages to every man on Facebook with the first and last name of this person listed on my DNA relatives list.  


"What does the report say about me other than my name?" one man asked.


I then shared a screenshot that had the name plus "177 cM" and "2nd to 3rd cousin" to calm his nerves by showing the test didn't reveal anything personal, although his question already showed me he wasn't the guy I was looking for because if he was he would already have the test results and be able to search matches on his own. 


We continued our electronic chat.


"Sorry that I can't help you. I'm sure that isn't me," he said. "But I am 5'8" or 5'9," so the 177 cm is pretty close to my height." 


I never considered myself an expert on DNA amounts (centimorgans), but I felt much less ignorant that day.

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