A Day in the Life of an Autism Mom

As we start our daily FaceTime, Mark lets me see his smiley face. He doesn’t always, or at least not for long. 

As usual, he starts to roam, and I see walls and halls and the look of mischief on his face. “Where are you going?” I ask. Guys like him can be honest to a fault. 

“I’m going into Alex’s room,” he says. 

“Oh no!” I think. Mark's housemate sometimes gets mad at Mark for sneaking in to get his snacks. 

I think lots of things. 

I think of how confidently Mark says “Alex’s room,” though he often seems confused when he sees Alex’s face. "Hi!" he says to him and then follows the greeting with a female staff member’s name. This bothers Alex more than the food grabbing.

Next, I think of how another one of the four housemates has the flu, and my mom instincts kick in. 

“You need to go back into your room,” I say. "One of the guys in your house is sick."

Mark listens closely to my words and returns to his room. I'm sure of this because I see the photos of our family on his wall. 

In a few minutes, after a little more chit chat, he starts wandering again. What is he up to now? 

“M-a-r-k! What are you doing?” I ask. 

He gives me a look as if to say, “Don’t ask the obvious” and then tells it to me. 

“I’m talking to Mom,” he says. That was not what I meant with my question, but what he tells me is true. I smile. 

“I’m glad you’re feeling better today,” I say. “Hey! Do you know who you’ll be with tonight?” 

“Megan!” he says enthusiastically. Young and beautiful, she’s one of his favorite staff at his supported living community. Last week she made him cheese pizza.

"I wonder what you'll do tonight," I add.

“Go bowling with Megan,” he tells me. He knows his weekly schedule and is getting excited about the evening plans.

“Do you want to keep talking or hang up?” I ask. 

“Hang up!” 

Once upon a time, this answer would have broken my heart, but now it comforts me. 

Each day he needs me a tiny bit less than the day before.